Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Have you ever had a day? Just a day, not good - or bad?
Today and some days are just a day. Not good, not bad. Nothing good or bad happens, its just my mindset. I call it 'getting stuck in my own head' and it happens to me occasionally. On days like this, I have to constantly remind myself that I have a good - no, a GREAT life. There is not much that I need or should long for. I could detail the pros, which vastly outweigh the cons, but I won't.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Reality Shows - are they really reality?
For the past, oh, I don't know, 17 years, there has been this strange phenomenon called reality shows. There have been many thought as to which show was the original reality show. For some strange reason, no one seems to want to mention the Real World on MTV. I'm not sure if the 'powers that be' don't think that MTV is a real TV station, capeable of producing anything aside from just playing a video. What happens when seven complete strangers are introduced to one another and told that they will be sharing a house for the next 6 weeks. The house they share is fantastic, with all amenities, including the obligatory hot tub, but the tiny catch is that there are cameras, infared and regular, watching you, 24 -7. So the Real World has been on MTV since 1992, so far as I can tell, this is the longest running reality show on tv. There are a few resons why this is the case, the main reason is that the MTV dempographic is always changing to be the 18 - 25 set. There is always a new set of eyes to watch this show, and becasue the cast is new every season; there is no host the way Big Brother and Suvivor, there is always a new city and a new set of drama queens to hate, love, fight, bicker, argue and love to hate.
So just as the Real World is, in my small and humble opinion, the original and I dare say, the best reality show created, there are some really, really bad, and pretty good realtity shows that I would like to chronicle.
So, riddle me this, Batman, what makes a reality show bad? And, if there is prize money involved, is it still a reality show, or is it a game show? For agruments' sake, we'll classify them as the same, if only becasue the individulas in this are generally an average person. There are some red flag indicators that will tell you if a reality show is going to be good; if its going to be strictly bubble gum, or its going to be something that will make the contestants become better people.
In no particlar order the the following reality shows are the worst, most train wrecked, overly dramatic, save-the-drama-for-your-momma, I can't avert my burning eyes, fluff, you have got to be kidding me shows.
Addicted to Beauty
Octo-mom. She just signed on FOX for a show
John and Kate Plus Eight. This should be called Kate the Shrew & her minions (and the sperm donor and whipping boy - John)
The Hills. Which, I'm obligated to say, that I have never watched a single minute of any of this show and I feel that my life is fuller for not doing so. I really don't understand any of it, but that aside, it makes my eyes burn.
The Real Housewives (of anything). Oh gawd, please, please, please tell me the world has seen enough of overprivleaged, botox injected, silicone plumped, spoiled, bitchy have it all housewives. Orange County, New York, Atlanta, New Jersey, please tell me that there is no more room for another city for five women who, all they really have to do is shop, workout, raise kids (with paid help) and screw their husbands. I'll tell you what, if that's all I had to do all day, I think I'd be a self-centered bitch also. The ONLY exception to the aforementioned rant is Caroline from New Jersey. Good family, hard workers and she's extremely passionate about how inportant her family is to her
NYC Prep. I can't even go there. Oveprivleaged small minded teenagers. What could be worse?
Flipping Out. Sad, but not sad in touching; 'Aaww, how sweet.' way, but sad in a 'Are you really seirous?' way. Funny, but not ha-ha funny; funny as in 'we're laughing at you, not with you'. I'm not saying that what he does is not meticiulous and perfectly put together, I just don't understand how someone can be so incredibly neurotic and manage people to flip a house and make a living. GO figure.
Miami Social. See above entry for NYC Prep, except they are adults who are convinced that if you are beautiful on the outside, there is nothing else that matters. Interestingly and sadly enough, these people will never know what unconditional love and acceptance is, because all of the people they are surrounding themselevs with are beautuful and shallow. How sad. Really sad.
So just as the Real World is, in my small and humble opinion, the original and I dare say, the best reality show created, there are some really, really bad, and pretty good realtity shows that I would like to chronicle.
So, riddle me this, Batman, what makes a reality show bad? And, if there is prize money involved, is it still a reality show, or is it a game show? For agruments' sake, we'll classify them as the same, if only becasue the individulas in this are generally an average person. There are some red flag indicators that will tell you if a reality show is going to be good; if its going to be strictly bubble gum, or its going to be something that will make the contestants become better people.
In no particlar order the the following reality shows are the worst, most train wrecked, overly dramatic, save-the-drama-for-your-momma, I can't avert my burning eyes, fluff, you have got to be kidding me shows.
Addicted to Beauty
Octo-mom. She just signed on FOX for a show
John and Kate Plus Eight. This should be called Kate the Shrew & her minions (and the sperm donor and whipping boy - John)
The Hills. Which, I'm obligated to say, that I have never watched a single minute of any of this show and I feel that my life is fuller for not doing so. I really don't understand any of it, but that aside, it makes my eyes burn.
The Real Housewives (of anything). Oh gawd, please, please, please tell me the world has seen enough of overprivleaged, botox injected, silicone plumped, spoiled, bitchy have it all housewives. Orange County, New York, Atlanta, New Jersey, please tell me that there is no more room for another city for five women who, all they really have to do is shop, workout, raise kids (with paid help) and screw their husbands. I'll tell you what, if that's all I had to do all day, I think I'd be a self-centered bitch also. The ONLY exception to the aforementioned rant is Caroline from New Jersey. Good family, hard workers and she's extremely passionate about how inportant her family is to her
NYC Prep. I can't even go there. Oveprivleaged small minded teenagers. What could be worse?
Flipping Out. Sad, but not sad in touching; 'Aaww, how sweet.' way, but sad in a 'Are you really seirous?' way. Funny, but not ha-ha funny; funny as in 'we're laughing at you, not with you'. I'm not saying that what he does is not meticiulous and perfectly put together, I just don't understand how someone can be so incredibly neurotic and manage people to flip a house and make a living. GO figure.
Miami Social. See above entry for NYC Prep, except they are adults who are convinced that if you are beautiful on the outside, there is nothing else that matters. Interestingly and sadly enough, these people will never know what unconditional love and acceptance is, because all of the people they are surrounding themselevs with are beautuful and shallow. How sad. Really sad.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Chincoteague Island and Snow Hill, Md
Talk about needing to get away for a weekend, we needed it. It's almost as if we took this weekend for ourselves because for the next three weeks we have stuff going on all weekend. So we decided to escape for a weekend to our favorite B& B in Snow Hill, Md called the Mansion House http://www.mansionhousebnb.com/. Its actually in a bay side 'town' called Public Landing. Not only is it on the bay, but its right on the bay, so you get a fabulous breeze and a beautiful view across the water. George is the innkeeper and a great guy who will make a fantastic breakfast to keep you going until dinner.
So on Saturday we went to the Chincoteague Bay for some kayaking and it was well worth it. We were barley out of the channel where we launched the kayaks and there was a family of otters playing in the water. http://animaldiversity.ummz.umich.edu/site/accounts/information/Lontra_canadensis.html
We spied each other about the same time, and I think they were as curious about what we were doing as we were to see them. There were about six of them playing in the water. As we approached them, they would duck under the water and then pop up about 5 feet away, all while keeping an eye on us. As we passed them, we could hear them coming up for air and taking breaths. This was such an incredible experience and I feel so fortunate to have seen them so close and in person.
THEN we saw ponies with babies, who was sleeping. The guide told us that the ponies hang in groups called bands which generally consist of a stallion and a few mares. They were eating at the waters edge with one stallion, three mares and one baby. We continued to paddle around the bay to see what was there to see. There were people fishing, crabbing and a lot on pontoon boats that took the lazy tourists around. As opposed to kayaking.
When we were done with the kayaking, we went to a bar for some lunch and laughed at some guy that was busy getting hammered at 11:30 in the morning. Pretty funny because he was in a bar that had a pretty equal mix of tourists and locals and he was griping, among other things, about 'these freeking tourists...' He also was commenting that when he was in the Navy he said that he liked to, when he went to the bar '...go ugly early...' He said he wanted to get a girl that wasn't so great looking in the beginning of the night because she was going to be the prettiest girl. He said he wanted to avoid the rush. Yeah, funny! We learned a lot of stuff about that strange guy, and thankfully we were able to leave and stop learning about him. There is a God!
We actually made it onto Chincoteague Island; two dollars well spent, and walked our pins off before we even made it to the beach. We learned at the visitors center that there was a walking path that led to a viewing area for the ponies. As we approached the loop path parking area, we went from walking in the sun to walking under trees. I'm incredibly grateful that George thought ahead and gave us some heavy duty bug repellent that was in a cream form. I'm not sure who made the stuff, but it really worked. As we walked under the shaded area, we were ATTACKED by giant flying mosquito bombers. Oh mu gawd, they were huge and really bold. We were swarmed by about a few dozen of them. It was a scramble to get the backpack off, dig out the repellent and smear it on our exposed skin all while swatting the mosquitoes that were landing on our exposed skin.
After we battled the mosquitoes, we continued to walk towards the parking area to path. We herd the very distinct sound of horses naying and snorting. I looked at Tommy and we both silently agreed that we should follow the noise. We looked for a footpath, that I think we were not really allowed to be on, and came to a high tensile fence and a clearing. There was about 50 - 75 ponies all clustered together, eating and checking us out. It was really a great experience to know that we were not really allowed to be there and we found the ponies, en masse. When we were walking towards the ponies, the ground seemed to be moving and squeaking. I looked down at my feet and saw dozens, hundreds - I may say, toads! I couldn't grab ANY of them because I had highly toxic insect repellent on them. Total bummer and I would have smuggled one home for the garden. There were small ones, as small as a quarter and big ones as large as a bottom of a highball glass. They were all warning themselves on the sunny path. Very cute.
I think going back to Chincoteague is definitely on the agenda.
Next post: Reality shows... Where do they find these people??
So on Saturday we went to the Chincoteague Bay for some kayaking and it was well worth it. We were barley out of the channel where we launched the kayaks and there was a family of otters playing in the water. http://animaldiversity.ummz.umich.edu/site/accounts/information/Lontra_canadensis.html
We spied each other about the same time, and I think they were as curious about what we were doing as we were to see them. There were about six of them playing in the water. As we approached them, they would duck under the water and then pop up about 5 feet away, all while keeping an eye on us. As we passed them, we could hear them coming up for air and taking breaths. This was such an incredible experience and I feel so fortunate to have seen them so close and in person.
THEN we saw ponies with babies, who was sleeping. The guide told us that the ponies hang in groups called bands which generally consist of a stallion and a few mares. They were eating at the waters edge with one stallion, three mares and one baby. We continued to paddle around the bay to see what was there to see. There were people fishing, crabbing and a lot on pontoon boats that took the lazy tourists around. As opposed to kayaking.
When we were done with the kayaking, we went to a bar for some lunch and laughed at some guy that was busy getting hammered at 11:30 in the morning. Pretty funny because he was in a bar that had a pretty equal mix of tourists and locals and he was griping, among other things, about 'these freeking tourists...' He also was commenting that when he was in the Navy he said that he liked to, when he went to the bar '...go ugly early...' He said he wanted to get a girl that wasn't so great looking in the beginning of the night because she was going to be the prettiest girl. He said he wanted to avoid the rush. Yeah, funny! We learned a lot of stuff about that strange guy, and thankfully we were able to leave and stop learning about him. There is a God!
We actually made it onto Chincoteague Island; two dollars well spent, and walked our pins off before we even made it to the beach. We learned at the visitors center that there was a walking path that led to a viewing area for the ponies. As we approached the loop path parking area, we went from walking in the sun to walking under trees. I'm incredibly grateful that George thought ahead and gave us some heavy duty bug repellent that was in a cream form. I'm not sure who made the stuff, but it really worked. As we walked under the shaded area, we were ATTACKED by giant flying mosquito bombers. Oh mu gawd, they were huge and really bold. We were swarmed by about a few dozen of them. It was a scramble to get the backpack off, dig out the repellent and smear it on our exposed skin all while swatting the mosquitoes that were landing on our exposed skin.
After we battled the mosquitoes, we continued to walk towards the parking area to path. We herd the very distinct sound of horses naying and snorting. I looked at Tommy and we both silently agreed that we should follow the noise. We looked for a footpath, that I think we were not really allowed to be on, and came to a high tensile fence and a clearing. There was about 50 - 75 ponies all clustered together, eating and checking us out. It was really a great experience to know that we were not really allowed to be there and we found the ponies, en masse. When we were walking towards the ponies, the ground seemed to be moving and squeaking. I looked down at my feet and saw dozens, hundreds - I may say, toads! I couldn't grab ANY of them because I had highly toxic insect repellent on them. Total bummer and I would have smuggled one home for the garden. There were small ones, as small as a quarter and big ones as large as a bottom of a highball glass. They were all warning themselves on the sunny path. Very cute.
I think going back to Chincoteague is definitely on the agenda.
Next post: Reality shows... Where do they find these people??
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
John Gosslins' 350z Nismo
I have to start this entry with the statement that I love the new Nissan 350z. I say new because I had an old 340z, the original v
ersion of the 350z, which was actually a Datsun. AND it was yellow! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Datsun Check the Wikipedia link for more details about Datsun and Nissan. At any rate, I really thought that car was the bomb! I bought it for $800. and it had no rear lights what so ever, including turn signals, and it ran rich. I didn't know there were no lights until I made a stop and right turn and heard the delivery truck behind me lay on his brakes and leave a patch of rubber during the panic stop to avoid catapulting me into the next intersection. I got the brakes lights fixed later on that day. So I have a special place in my heart for the Datsun 340z, now would like a Nissan 350z, but I'm content with my Mustang now.
ersion of the 350z, which was actually a Datsun. AND it was yellow! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Datsun Check the Wikipedia link for more details about Datsun and Nissan. At any rate, I really thought that car was the bomb! I bought it for $800. and it had no rear lights what so ever, including turn signals, and it ran rich. I didn't know there were no lights until I made a stop and right turn and heard the delivery truck behind me lay on his brakes and leave a patch of rubber during the panic stop to avoid catapulting me into the next intersection. I got the brakes lights fixed later on that day. So I have a special place in my heart for the Datsun 340z, now would like a Nissan 350z, but I'm content with my Mustang now.So anyway, John Gosslin.....  Ummm, I think he traded in the 350z in for a BMW M3, which is another good choice for a fun car.  But I'm telling you right now, if he is going to get an apartment in New York City, he better get a beater Honda or Ford to drive up there.  NYC is no place for a perfect, new BMW M3.  But rumor says that he's going to be renting in the Trump Plaza (don't get me started about that fool!!), so he'll have valet parking.  I suppose when you and your psycho, all-I've-ever-wanted-to-be-is-a-mom wife, have two litters of children and then get a reality show and then get divorced, you become an E-list celebrity.
Well, whatever...  Enough of this foolishness.
My Husband, the Passenger Narcoleptic
I must be a good driver because when Tommy and I go somewhere and I am the driver, it takes about 5 minutes and Tommy's chin in bouncing off his chest.  We could be going from my parents house to our house, roughly a 20 minute drive.  He's done and snoozing in the front seat.  Thankfully when we are going on vacation and he's the navigator (it works better like that) he'll manage to stay awake if there are some navigational changes that we would have to make.  However, if the road is straight, like say, uummm, route 95 to Myrtle Beach, he's done!  I'm driving, listening to the radio, watching him doze.  The best part about all of this is that he doesn't lay the seat back.  He thinks that he's going to stay awake! Nnooooo, I don't think so.  None the less, I take it as a compliment that he thinks that I'm a good driver (insert rainman here) and he's comfortable enough to fall asleep.  It's cool, I dig it!
Saturday, May 16, 2009
New and exciting? Not really...
There are about a dozen things that I should be doing right now, and writing this Blog is not on that list.  So what am I doing?  Writing in this thing.  Hell, why not?  No sun, can't dry laundry outside and I have to start dinner soon. 
On the other hand, there are about a hundred things that I could talk about... Oh where to start? Tommy and I just returned from Penn State where we watched Ani, Tommy's youngest sister, walk across the stage and get her degree in Agribusiness Management. Tom and Karen get a huge congratulations along with Ani because they have paid for college for nearly 10 years for all three of their children to attend college. Absolutely tremendous!
We took the Mustang and left the house at 6:15am. We arrived on campus at 8:20, exactly the time that I said I would be there... I know, I'm awesome. As I mentioned shortly before, we took the Mustang and I so totally and absolutely enjoy driving that machine. Up the hills, down the hills, around the corners; the damn thing sticks to the road so well, I wonder how fast I have to get the thing going to see if it'll fling itself off the road. I don't really want to try that, but its interesting to imagine. And, I couldn't have gauged the gas any better. We were pulling up to the gas station near the house and the gas readout said -0- miles until empty. I filled the tank with 14.5 gallons and realized that I had 1.5 gallons left in the tank. I could have driven to my parents house on that! Also, we got an average of 25.5 miles per gallon on this trip. Not bad for having my foot in it. We were about 80mph the whole way, except for the 45 mph through the town on the other side of the river at Harrisburg. Its a wonder you have to go from 80 to 45 through the town, which consists on not much more on the main strip than jerk off joints, seedy strip 'clubs', gas stops and restaurants. Interesting.
I forgot that Tommy drove home and he totally looks HOT driving that car. Well, he's the hottest thing on the planet to me, but he looks even hotter driving the Mustang. I love him...
And now onto a totally different subject (hello ADD!). The new Healthy Choice commercials with Julia Louis Dryfus are soooooo freeking funny! I nearly died when I saw this commercial for the first time. Check it...
http://www.spokespersonwanted.com/ Click on #2 and enjoy. If you get grossed out... well you need to lighten up! This is funny people!
That's all for me today!
Happy and safe driving!
Ash
On the other hand, there are about a hundred things that I could talk about... Oh where to start? Tommy and I just returned from Penn State where we watched Ani, Tommy's youngest sister, walk across the stage and get her degree in Agribusiness Management. Tom and Karen get a huge congratulations along with Ani because they have paid for college for nearly 10 years for all three of their children to attend college. Absolutely tremendous!
We took the Mustang and left the house at 6:15am. We arrived on campus at 8:20, exactly the time that I said I would be there... I know, I'm awesome. As I mentioned shortly before, we took the Mustang and I so totally and absolutely enjoy driving that machine. Up the hills, down the hills, around the corners; the damn thing sticks to the road so well, I wonder how fast I have to get the thing going to see if it'll fling itself off the road. I don't really want to try that, but its interesting to imagine. And, I couldn't have gauged the gas any better. We were pulling up to the gas station near the house and the gas readout said -0- miles until empty. I filled the tank with 14.5 gallons and realized that I had 1.5 gallons left in the tank. I could have driven to my parents house on that! Also, we got an average of 25.5 miles per gallon on this trip. Not bad for having my foot in it. We were about 80mph the whole way, except for the 45 mph through the town on the other side of the river at Harrisburg. Its a wonder you have to go from 80 to 45 through the town, which consists on not much more on the main strip than jerk off joints, seedy strip 'clubs', gas stops and restaurants. Interesting.
I forgot that Tommy drove home and he totally looks HOT driving that car. Well, he's the hottest thing on the planet to me, but he looks even hotter driving the Mustang. I love him...
And now onto a totally different subject (hello ADD!). The new Healthy Choice commercials with Julia Louis Dryfus are soooooo freeking funny! I nearly died when I saw this commercial for the first time. Check it...
http://www.spokespersonwanted.com/ Click on #2 and enjoy. If you get grossed out... well you need to lighten up! This is funny people!
That's all for me today!
Happy and safe driving!
Ash
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Upcoming Topics
Ninjas and Pirates; funny commercials and the employment of the correct car for a character in movies, does your car make you a tool.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Someone please tell my WHY
Why Why Why do these little boys, by little I mean 16-18 year old boys, think the Volkswagen's are the COOLEST things that have ever been created??  No, not so much.  There are two camps of Volkswagen drivers and one subset group.  (Genny just hear me out here...) 
The first set is the aforementioned 'little boys' that think that VW's are the total shit!! And as I may have mentioned before, not really. These boys do some crazy things to their new rabbits, and jettas such as big fat tires and spoilers on the rear of the car and skinny tires on the front of the car. I'll get to the fart cannons next. OK, lets think about this, fat tires and spoilers on the rear indicate that there is some kind of traction on the rear of the car. No, these are front wheel drive cars, so having these extra wide tires on the rear makes NO sense. Smaller tires on the front make even less sense. More traction to the drive tires makes for better take off, handling and grip in general. So if you want to look like Johnny the race car driver, put fat tires in the front. Then they like to lower these cars, but not by performance packages, no, they like to heat the springs to make them closer to the ground. This makes the ride incredibly stiff and doesn't really increase the performance of the vehicle.
What about these exhaust tips and aftermarket exhausts?? An aftermarket exhaust is suppose to add to thee performance of the vehicle by increasing the airflow out. The more air out, the more air in. However, if the owner did not enhance the intake, the outflow becomes almost irrelevant. Nonetheless, these these cannons on the exhaust are stupid and do not add to any performance lever of the car. They just make the car sound different, not even better. Not to mention that they are incredibly annoying.
These 'performance enhancements' that are really not enhancing anything, they are strictly cosmetic to make people think that they are big shot street racers. Pl-eeaassee!
So they are the first group. The second group of VW drivers are the people who are a little older, maybe 35 - 55 and have the money to buy a new or off lease VW that's in good shape. But the general definition of this group of people are that they are idealistic and think that their VW is the best thing on the planet. Generally these people will tend to own a MAC instead of a PC, they possibly waited in line when the new iPhone was unveiled to the public. They may wear organic shoes and generally love the fact that they are vegetarians or vegans. They decided to not buy a hybrid vehicle, not because they don't think they are great (Honda or Toyota ONLY), but because they had to order one. That would take to long to wait for it to come it. They would never consider a Ford of GM vehicle because they are way too common and anyone can drive them, hell, they practically give them away, right??
The the subset of both of these groups are the people who like the VW's and after buying one, they realize that they are incredibly expensive to fix. So they buy a VW and then it breaks and they realize that they have to keep it. So they drive it and when they pay it off, they sell it to the first willing sucker who will give them the Kelly Blue Book Private Party - Poor Condition price for it. Maybe the seller will throw in a half used set of snow tires and call it a deal! The seller just wants it out of their driveway, thank you very much!
One last thing then I'm done with my, ahem - observations...
In order to drive a new Corvette, the driver generally - 85% of the time, has to have three of the following traits. 60% of the time, you'll find that they have at least two of the following traits. 1. Bald(ing) 2. Old(er) 55+ 3. Facial Hair (generally a mustache) 4. Paunchy (generally doughy) 5. Driving like a total asshole. Now, there are exceptions to every rule, however, you can use this formula all you want, you'll find that it's pretty right -on... But what if the driver is a woman?? Generally she will not be any of these... She'll be ether totally high maintenance (You know and I know that a high maintenance woman is easily identifiable), or she's driving her present to herself for whatever milestone she decided that she'll buy a 'vette. All I've got to say about the latter is "Work it out Girl, you probably deserve it!!"
And something that I haven't mentioned at all; Drifting.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lM5wVKYZVDM
Then this guy. The man does some serious WORK!
http://video.kenblockracing.com/flash/player/
After you watch this video, YOU'LL be out of breath!
Thanks for reading and safe driving!
The first set is the aforementioned 'little boys' that think that VW's are the total shit!! And as I may have mentioned before, not really. These boys do some crazy things to their new rabbits, and jettas such as big fat tires and spoilers on the rear of the car and skinny tires on the front of the car. I'll get to the fart cannons next. OK, lets think about this, fat tires and spoilers on the rear indicate that there is some kind of traction on the rear of the car. No, these are front wheel drive cars, so having these extra wide tires on the rear makes NO sense. Smaller tires on the front make even less sense. More traction to the drive tires makes for better take off, handling and grip in general. So if you want to look like Johnny the race car driver, put fat tires in the front. Then they like to lower these cars, but not by performance packages, no, they like to heat the springs to make them closer to the ground. This makes the ride incredibly stiff and doesn't really increase the performance of the vehicle.
What about these exhaust tips and aftermarket exhausts?? An aftermarket exhaust is suppose to add to thee performance of the vehicle by increasing the airflow out. The more air out, the more air in. However, if the owner did not enhance the intake, the outflow becomes almost irrelevant. Nonetheless, these these cannons on the exhaust are stupid and do not add to any performance lever of the car. They just make the car sound different, not even better. Not to mention that they are incredibly annoying.
These 'performance enhancements' that are really not enhancing anything, they are strictly cosmetic to make people think that they are big shot street racers. Pl-eeaassee!
So they are the first group. The second group of VW drivers are the people who are a little older, maybe 35 - 55 and have the money to buy a new or off lease VW that's in good shape. But the general definition of this group of people are that they are idealistic and think that their VW is the best thing on the planet. Generally these people will tend to own a MAC instead of a PC, they possibly waited in line when the new iPhone was unveiled to the public. They may wear organic shoes and generally love the fact that they are vegetarians or vegans. They decided to not buy a hybrid vehicle, not because they don't think they are great (Honda or Toyota ONLY), but because they had to order one. That would take to long to wait for it to come it. They would never consider a Ford of GM vehicle because they are way too common and anyone can drive them, hell, they practically give them away, right??
The the subset of both of these groups are the people who like the VW's and after buying one, they realize that they are incredibly expensive to fix. So they buy a VW and then it breaks and they realize that they have to keep it. So they drive it and when they pay it off, they sell it to the first willing sucker who will give them the Kelly Blue Book Private Party - Poor Condition price for it. Maybe the seller will throw in a half used set of snow tires and call it a deal! The seller just wants it out of their driveway, thank you very much!
One last thing then I'm done with my, ahem - observations...
In order to drive a new Corvette, the driver generally - 85% of the time, has to have three of the following traits. 60% of the time, you'll find that they have at least two of the following traits. 1. Bald(ing) 2. Old(er) 55+ 3. Facial Hair (generally a mustache) 4. Paunchy (generally doughy) 5. Driving like a total asshole. Now, there are exceptions to every rule, however, you can use this formula all you want, you'll find that it's pretty right -on... But what if the driver is a woman?? Generally she will not be any of these... She'll be ether totally high maintenance (You know and I know that a high maintenance woman is easily identifiable), or she's driving her present to herself for whatever milestone she decided that she'll buy a 'vette. All I've got to say about the latter is "Work it out Girl, you probably deserve it!!"
And something that I haven't mentioned at all; Drifting.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lM5wVKYZVDM
Then this guy. The man does some serious WORK!
http://video.kenblockracing.com/flash/player/
After you watch this video, YOU'LL be out of breath!
Thanks for reading and safe driving!
Friday, April 17, 2009
#1
So here I am, writing a blog about my Mustang. I never thought that I would but here I am. There are a number of reasons that I want to write about my car; well I want to do more than just write about my car. I plan on talking about cars in general and how much we, as Americans, enjoy our cars. There are, of course, emotions that revolve around cars and sometimes those emotions are much more dramatic than that of the vehicle.
Something that may have triggered my thought process to want to do this was last night we were watching BBC America (more later on how much I LOVE that channel) and there was a BBC America Reveals: My Car is My Lover. We were awe struck at the two men who were being profiled. The first guy was, I think from San Francisco and drove a white mid 70's Volkswagen Bug whom he named 'Vanilla'. The man was in love with this car (emphasis on in love). Whenever he parked the car somewhere and got out, he kissed the car numerous times and told 'her' that he loved her. Ummm, yeah. Then there was the other guy, who was younger, maybe early to mid-20's had a 1990 Firebird with a lazy headlight - it shone on the ground directly in front of the bumper, no interior headliner and a faded paint job. He called it 'Todd' and referred to it as such. They both spoke about having 'sex' with their cars and the guy who owned Vanilla, went to far as to masturbate on the Firebird, aka Todd during the night after these 'mechaphiles' actually met.
The funniest thing about these guys was when they went to a car rally. There were all kinds of makes and models - everything from modified vehicles to run of the mill, plain old units. The owner of Vanilla was so aroused that he was touching himself and had a visible boner in his pants! I mean it was so bad for him that he was bending down, fingering the tail pipes and then smelling his fingers. I nearly died when I saw him do that. Then he was kissing and caressing the cars. I mean it was really weird!
The other guy, the mechaphile with Todd, was a bit more realistic about his obsession. He was aware that what he thought was strange and that he was apprehensive to talk about it, but he still spoke about wanting to 'rape' Todd the car. But he did mention the emotion of connecting with the car and really loving the car. But the sex part is a little strange. http://www.bbcamerica.com/content/366/index.jsp
This whole thing is really off the charts for someone who doesn't care about cars and just thinks that they are transportation. I agree that they are made to get you from one place to another, but on a different plane, they do exude an aura and a feeling. They do have emotion, the emotion that the owner gives them. The emotion of power, styling, grace, safety and comfort.
Take, for example, an article I saw on MSN today How to look cool driving a Mini Van. First off that's totally impossible. There is NO WAY anyone can look cool driving a minivan. I don't care if you are the hottest man or woman in show business, there is not a flaming chance that you will be cool. Ok, my point is that the car makes the driver have emotion and that emotion is transferred to the car... Make sense? Kind of, I suppose. Can you look freekin awesome driving a Mustang? Yes, but if you pull asshole stunts on the drivers around you, then you look like a flaming turd and decidedly unattractive!
One last thing about the emotion of the car. On BBC America's Top Gear, the best freekin show on TV, the hosts have the 'Wall of Cool' where the three hosts decide if a car is cool or not. There are four areas where a car can be and the worst place to be is in the Sub-zero because you are a true tool for driving that car.
http://www.topgear.com/us/
Check the site and you will understand.
Thanks for reading!
Something that may have triggered my thought process to want to do this was last night we were watching BBC America (more later on how much I LOVE that channel) and there was a BBC America Reveals: My Car is My Lover. We were awe struck at the two men who were being profiled. The first guy was, I think from San Francisco and drove a white mid 70's Volkswagen Bug whom he named 'Vanilla'. The man was in love with this car (emphasis on in love). Whenever he parked the car somewhere and got out, he kissed the car numerous times and told 'her' that he loved her. Ummm, yeah. Then there was the other guy, who was younger, maybe early to mid-20's had a 1990 Firebird with a lazy headlight - it shone on the ground directly in front of the bumper, no interior headliner and a faded paint job. He called it 'Todd' and referred to it as such. They both spoke about having 'sex' with their cars and the guy who owned Vanilla, went to far as to masturbate on the Firebird, aka Todd during the night after these 'mechaphiles' actually met.
The funniest thing about these guys was when they went to a car rally. There were all kinds of makes and models - everything from modified vehicles to run of the mill, plain old units. The owner of Vanilla was so aroused that he was touching himself and had a visible boner in his pants! I mean it was so bad for him that he was bending down, fingering the tail pipes and then smelling his fingers. I nearly died when I saw him do that. Then he was kissing and caressing the cars. I mean it was really weird!
The other guy, the mechaphile with Todd, was a bit more realistic about his obsession. He was aware that what he thought was strange and that he was apprehensive to talk about it, but he still spoke about wanting to 'rape' Todd the car. But he did mention the emotion of connecting with the car and really loving the car. But the sex part is a little strange. http://www.bbcamerica.com/content/366/index.jsp
This whole thing is really off the charts for someone who doesn't care about cars and just thinks that they are transportation. I agree that they are made to get you from one place to another, but on a different plane, they do exude an aura and a feeling. They do have emotion, the emotion that the owner gives them. The emotion of power, styling, grace, safety and comfort.
Take, for example, an article I saw on MSN today How to look cool driving a Mini Van. First off that's totally impossible. There is NO WAY anyone can look cool driving a minivan. I don't care if you are the hottest man or woman in show business, there is not a flaming chance that you will be cool. Ok, my point is that the car makes the driver have emotion and that emotion is transferred to the car... Make sense? Kind of, I suppose. Can you look freekin awesome driving a Mustang? Yes, but if you pull asshole stunts on the drivers around you, then you look like a flaming turd and decidedly unattractive!
One last thing about the emotion of the car. On BBC America's Top Gear, the best freekin show on TV, the hosts have the 'Wall of Cool' where the three hosts decide if a car is cool or not. There are four areas where a car can be and the worst place to be is in the Sub-zero because you are a true tool for driving that car.
http://www.topgear.com/us/
Check the site and you will understand.
Thanks for reading!
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
